The light I am.

I am light
and love
and all of the growth given to me through pain and experience and joy and loss.
I am the real life sum of all that was and still can be.

Today I was attacked by someone who thought I was someone else. I was slandered and called names. My integrity was challenged and my looks degraded. I was threatened and called by name wrongly on social media.

It made me sick and having no idea what was happening or why.

Then one by one people who know me came to my defense. They stood up for and behind my character. It was awful and shook me down.

The matter was soon sorted out and apologies came but I would be lying to say some damage wasn’t done.

My heart hurt.

I dropped into a mediation with my retreat group, I dove head first into the pain to make some sense of it. Why did it happen? What did I need to learn? How could the names I was called and the hate I received be undone inside of me? 
Drop in.

This is what came,

“You’re not your trauma
Not the lies
Not the anxiety
Not your job or family or friends
You’re not you pain and loss

I am light
And love
And all the growth given to me through pain and experience and joy and loss
I am the real life sum of all that was and still can be.”

And as if I needed further assurance, as I wrote “I am light” a beam from the window, sunlight kissing the page as a seal of certainty. I am not those names, or that ugly face, or defined by the hate that was thrown. I am me, light and love. 
Thank you to those who saw it and stepped in for my defense. I could never be any of those false accusations and I pray hard for the real offender. 
There is always a lesson, be true to who you are no matter what!